With this long-anticipated baby on the way, I’ve spent innumerable hours contemplating my maternal master plan. How grateful I am for the wisdom of Trisha and Amy – reminding me the importance of “keeping it real,” or realistic as the case may be! |
Expectations: The Mother of All Problems
by Trisha Ashworth and Amy Nobile
After hundreds of hours on the phone with dozens of women around the country, we started to recognize a pattern. Nine times out of ten, if a woman was unhappy in motherhood, her expectations were overblown. Working mothers expected they’d be able to do it all, and they felt like failures when they couldn’t. Stay-at-home moms expected that they’d stay sane kneeling on the floor twelve hours a day and that they’d feel lucky doing it.
We heard a lot of delusional thinking leading to a lot of delusional expectations:
- Motherhood will slide right into my life.
- With a few little tweaks, my career will stay on track.
- I’ll be completely fulfilled by my children as a stay-at-home mom.
- If I try hard enough, I can balance it all.
- Once I become a mother, I will become a more nurturing, selfless, giving person.
- I will be able to handle motherhood pretty easily.
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